Piece of the pie

I enjoyed reading Vicki Iovine’s, Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy, back when I was pregnant with my first born, years ago.

There are a few things that I remember clearly from that book, one of which is her description of when she approached her husband about wanting a fourth baby. He was not enthusiastic, not at all. He really couldn’t conceive of it, not because he didn’t like babies, or children, or being a father, but because he already didn’t have enough of his wife.

He explained it to her (something) like this, “Imagine that you are a pie -- with each child my piece of the pie, which used to be quite large, gets smaller. Every baby takes a big piece of the pie.”

I mentioned this pie analogy to my husband recently, and his response was, “Honey, I can’t even seem to find the pie tin.”

And it’s true, I really do feel like a ever disappearing pie these days. And I’m not trying to flatter myself here, I’m simply the only mom and wife in the house, there is no other. They all may long for another wife and mother sometimes, but it’s just me. Little ol’ me.

How to make the pie bigger? I guess one way is to stay up later or get up earlier, but in a crazy book I’m reading that Jacquie lent to me, the character who attempts this ends up walking to the wood pile, picking up the ax, and bringing it down on her husband’s skull.

I’m blood averse, so this is not a good plan for me. Plus then I’d be the only one in the house with a license, which would be very inconvenient. (Just kidding, honey.)

So what to do? Stop nursing the baby? Refuse to help with homework? Quit my job?

I like the last option, but unfortunately it’s just not feasible.

Obviously we all just need to suck it up, it’s what all families before us have done and those following us will continue to do. The older girls can start doing more, by themselves, the baby can, um, grow, and my husband can lock himself in his office and pretend that he never got married keep supporting me like he has been. For my part, I will continue to give everybody all I can, and remember that I damn well better enjoy today’s craziness as much as I can because someday they will be grown and gone.