Celeste of the (Jacuz)sea

I want you to meet Celeste.

I met her online.

It really can happen, you know. As soon as I saw her, I knew she was the one.

Is she not strikingly beautiful?

Just look at that black skin and golden flowing hair.


And what a magnificent shelled tail!

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I knew that she would be that special someone something to perfectly accent our recently re-painted (although not yet re-curtained) bathroom. She fits the color, size, and very essence of the room.

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I bought her straight away, the description only confiming my conviction:
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Bronze Mermaid! She has been spotted on the coasts of Cape Code, as well as the sandy shores of the Padre Islands, and some say as far away as Mexico. She is Mermaid Celeste...

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Mermaid Celeste!!

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When she arrived, I excitedly extracted her from her box, only to hear various disparaging comments. My husband thought her generally unattractive, and my girls, well, they both voiced the opinion that she was too fat!!

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Wtf? She's a mermaid, girls! How many of those have you actually ever seen? They come in all shapes and sizes. Not all mermaids look like Disney's Ariel! Puuleeze.

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They felt that her tail was too thick. And, okay, from the angle below, it is rather meaty, but in a strong, beautiful, pelagic sort-of way.

I was not deterred. I took Celeste and carried her right to her new home. Overlooking the Jacuzzi tub, where she'll be forever close to water.

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Does she not fit perfectly?

Yes, she does.

Welcome home, Celeste.