independence

We indulged ourselves a little bit this fourth of July. After all, Independence doesn't come every day of the year! It's a tough day for driving and parking, and our friends were going to be staying down by the bay for the duration. Rather than lurk at their doorstep and crash their party, we opted to book ourselves a lovely room of our own! And crash their party.

First things first, though. What's the first thing you do in a hotel?

Jump on things! Get your mind out of the gutter. My kids have always called this activity "mosquito." You stand on one bed and go "muh... skeet...." then as you jump you scream "TOE!" muh skeet toe. Get it?

It was a beautiful room with a beautiful view, this vantage point doesn't do it justice.

Ah, yes. That's better.

It really wasn't shabby at all.

Now that we've got the viewing out of the way, what's the second thing you do in a hotel?

Cartwheels down the hall, of course!

I kinda like this one sideways. I really want to manually point my own toes, though.

Perhaps my favorite thing about this series is that the maid's cart is right there. Did she see us? We weren't quiet by any means. She should have come out and taken a photo of the three of us! How rude.

This just so happened to be the very hotel where we had our wedding reception back when dinosaurs roamed the bay.

We just stayed one night, enjoying a fun evening with our buddies at the hotel next door while hooligans blew up shiny things. We were very smug to wake up by the water on July 4, our westy firmly ensconced in a parking space while the multitudes inched their way west.

I began my Independence the day at the fitness center. I'm not much for the machine work out, but the fridge full of cool towels, the chilled water, the free bananas.. who could complain?

Here's where I sat on my ass and pedaled while watching Rachel Ray and playing Words with Enemies Friends

Then our friends at the hotel next door came over to OUR hotel, and boy oh boy was there fun to be had with the festivities and the water slides and the body-checking duels over poolside chaise loungers. Much like a cruise ship, the staff were all foreign and gorgeous. Our most quotable line was when the German bingo caller got mad at kids for calling out BINGO without the numbers to back it up. He said: "You can't call bingo you don't have!" (be sure to read that with a German accent). At one point we heard a winner being announced after a hula hoop contest, and when herr bingo put the mic up to ask the winning kid his name, we heard an unmistakably familiar boy introduce himself as Ricardo.

Well done, Ricardo!

The girls were up next, as if anyone had a chance against my girl. She learned to hula hoop in the womb.

We finally scored two chairs, and pushed them together to create ass island.*

See the boys playing chicken? They kept getting in trouble so we had to pretend they weren't ours.

*Ass Island

*The Isle of Arses

We eventually made our way back across the street to the party where it was at. I hardly took any photos, I suck. But it was beautiful, and fun, and summer.

And all my favorite knuckleheads were there, running away from my camera.

I already booked the same room for next year. Who's in?