Entropy

Jacquie posted the video below to her Facebook page last week or the week before. I watched it only once, at the time of posting, but I kept revisiting it in my mind. I got his point, I really did, but kept wondering if I agreed with him. Am I the "I will grab tighter to this life and will not let this beauty fade" type of person, or am I more of an "I accept that everything is temporary" type of person.

I watched the video a few more times tonight. (And not only because I couldn't stop looking at Justin Silva.) Honestly, I work to be the latter -- the I-accept-that-everything-is-temporary, because, let's face it, that IS the way of the world, and once you internalize this you can work to spend more time in the now, and live it for what it is, without worrying about its future, and its eventual demise. But I totally identified with Jason Silva's take on the fact that we are all a bit melancholy, if even subconsciously, with the transient beauty of life and love. I feel that. A lot, actually.
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I'm not sure if the tears that spring to my eyes always stem from this innate knowledge that this most amazing moment will pass, or if some (or all?) of it is from the sheer beauty of an actual moment/experience. Am I just finally acknowledging the joy that everyday beauty can bring, or am I morning it's eventual (and often quick) passing?
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Because I do think that the beauty of, let's say, a sunset can bring us to tears only because of its aesthetic perfectness.
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It can, right? Or can it?
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This video really made me stop and think about it.
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I didn't used to tear up at amazing sunsets, or if I did, I don't remember it. This is relatively new, something that has accompanied mid-life.
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Is it just that I've been consciously working to be in the now and to see the beauty in everyday moments, and so can only now see a sunset for its amazing beauty? Or is it this melancholy of which Silva speaks, this knowing that it will all fade into nothingness that becomes a greater presence as we conitnue to age that is the trigger?

I don't consider myself old, and defintely not wise, but in my 20s? Pfft. This wasn't even on the radar. I loved sunsets then too -- pretty, pretty!! But I don't think I felt that angst, that subtle knowing of the fleeting nature of that blue and swirly pink and yellow and violet moment, and of all moments -- the feel of the soft skin of your newborn, a toddler's hands in your palm, a lover's look that sets your soul on fire -- that I feel now.
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Either way, squeeze it tight or hold it loosely, life is amazing and worth gulping in with hungry breaths. And even though I may not be a person bent on "extending the ephemeral nature of this moment," like Silva professes to be, I have to say that I totally agree with his view that "there's a sadness to the ecstasy." And that, "beautiful things can make us sad sometimes because what they hint at is the exception, a vision of something more, a rabbit hole to fall though, but a temporary one, a thing that is ultimately kind-of a tragedy."