blame the bougainvilla

I came here to talk about the fence!

I uploaded photos, sorted them in the order of the story I wanted to tell, drafted witty comments, and elicited the help of my kids to send photo updates to prepare a documentation of the fence project that is currently taking over our lives.

I left a space for the photo I wanted to use to demonstrate the illustrious beauty of the bougainvilla.

I've got an external hard drive that is mostly dedicated to photo storage, and whenever my phone or camera is getting bogged down with images I plug it in and back those sucker up to the hard drive. It's capacity is vast, I don't think I could ever fill it even with the impressive quantity of food and drink pictures I relentlessly save. (why? WHY?)  But if you know me at all you know that I've never taken the time to include any semblence of classification or organization in that hard drive. It's just a series of random folders called 'camera dump,' insert date.

On Thursday evening after spending a couple of wine fueled hours in the beauty magician's chair after work, I came home and set to work finding that bougainvilla photo to complete my fence post.

I wasn't having much luck with recent years, so I clicked through to those adorable early attempts I HAD made at organization, and I sought out visit/family member themes because I am forever making people pose in front of the damn bougainvilla.

I was waylaid, though. That one spot where I landed after a million folder and subfolder and file clicks just so happened to deposite me back to 7/29/08, when, to quote my wise and wonderful mother, we still had our innoncence. We still had dad. They still had Jidoo.

They still had Jidoo

It took my breath away.

He's been on my mind, of course. With our summer CT tripped just days away I'm always tansported, usually back to the bullshit that was 2010, then the poignant summers that have followed, thick with nostalgia and loss. But in July of 2008, we still had our damn innoncence.

He was making a speech as emcee of the cannonball contest awards

I love this so much. Mom is *cracking up* at her man

And we got to just reach out and touch him, crack up at him, be with him.

It's just dad, being dad. (and mark being an assbag)

We still had him. 

 

Mom still had him. Look at them!

They needed more time. 

The stupid fucking fence isn't finished anyway, I'll show you next week. But the lumber, the sawdust, the power tools, the measurements and precision and whistling around here these days? It's no wonder he came and bumped that bougainvilla.

We really miss you, Dad.

back to black(out)

Tuesday was uncharacteristically chilly and wet by San Diego standards. We loved it! Any weather at all is pure novelty for us sunlovers, and it’s been so incredibly hot for the past few months that the entire town let out a rousing yahoo when we finally had the chance to don sleeves and socks. Granted, most of us were sweating right through our stylish fall wardrobes by noon, but still.

After work I met my boys at home and made an unremarkable dinner of dirty rice, edamame and salad. I saved a plate for my girl then left to pick her up at the dance studio around the corner just as my boy was heading out to walk the dog.

Those mundane 15 minute tasks quickly became anything but, as the skies opened right up and all hell broke loose. When it first started raining I chuckled at the thought that boy and dog were probably high tailing it home, chagrined.  Shit quickly got real though, with the kind of thunder that rattles your windows and a sky streaked with lightening. I called home to make sure all men and beasts were safely back home and was on the phone when my girl came screaming out of the studio accompanied by a comically well timed crash of thunder. On the phone, Bill reported that the power had just gone out. Cue dramatic music.

It was very exciting! This stuff never happens to us, in fact the last time we’d had a power outage was that time when the dumb guy in Arizona flipped the wrong switch and turned out the lights for all of SoCal. That was super fun, remember?

So there we were. Ready for fun!

It was 7:35 and pitch dark outside. We gathered candles and flashlights and discussed how much power/time everyone had on their various handheld electronic devices.

Of course, it was right there. That bundle of visceral memories. But we were okay, we were safe and home and this blackout was not a harbinger of doom.

We pulled out a board game to pass the time. This might sound like a commonplace, unremarkable family activity.  Family Game Night is a thing, right? Every family does it! Except, not mine. My family does not like board games. They are a noncompetitive lot. *I* like board games, but not enough to be persuasive in their favor, I guess. We have backgammon, of course – everybody likes a briefcase presentation, and we’ve had periods of play that were fun and cool. Mostly while camping. Therefore, the backgammon lives in the westy and if none of us was willing to go to the curb to fetch battery operated lanterns, we surely weren’t going to make the trek to retrieve a game for only two players.

Under the playroom couch I found trivial pursuit, is that still relevant? Bill and I used to play a lot and argue about which answers were clever enough to be cheese-worthy, because God knows we were never in it for the long haul. I only ever wanted to answer brown and sometimes pink, anyway. Next to Trivial Pursuit I found the winner… Monopoly! Everyone was surprised that we even owned it, but I clearly remembered Santa bringing it one year because he insisted that every family needs to have a damn Monopoly set, you killjoys.

Santa was so right. We had to review the rules, there were varying opinions on everything from initial bankroll to free parking to rent vs mortgage, but eventually we settled in to a really fun and silly bona fide Family Game Night. By candelight, with wine and a pumpkin full of candy.

I kept taking really weird photos

 

 and could not figure out the origin of the shadow

that caused big black lines across every shot

Until the next day, when I removed the paper clip that was stuck in the lens hole of my phone case. Sigh.

We played until everyone got cranky, well past the time we usually separate to our various quarters to retire for the night. We left the game out on the table in the hopes that we’d return to finish it before the next time we gathered for a meal, although we all knew that was unlikely. 

As we said goodnight and divvied up flashlights to take into bathrooms and bedrooms with us, we got to talking about that other blackout. Not the Arizona bonehead one, the Dad one. I’m not the only one who teared up reminiscing about that night and how we couldn’t help but feel like even though it too was really fun and special, it had marked the start of something bad. We sniffed along, on our way to bed with hearts a bit heavier and dread lingering just beneath the surface. Seconds later, just as I walked into my bedroom, the lights came back on.

Thanks Dad. 

flashback: when we still had our innoncence

I had an innocent plan to find and recycle an old post of mine from around this date back when the blog was a baby. I found one, alright. Now please excuse me for a minute, I think there's something in my eye:

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

a shout out to my peeps

I had this silly idea that I would be able to come up with a singular, concise way to summarize our trip to Connecticut without writing a whole “how I spent my summer vacation” composition (although I do have access to some very chic mini-composition books thanks to Mumsie). But there is just too much to tell and show and laugh about, I have to sort through all 300ish photos before I can narrow them down to sharable status.

In the meantime, it's 5 am in California and I'm up with my gigantic puppy, but before crawling back into my bed (my bed! complete with husband!), I just want to say a big thank you to our kind and gracious hosts and hostesses with the most and mostesses! We had a completely marvelous trip because of your kind and generous hospitality!

To Mom and Dad:

Thank you for the endless hours at the pool



For the abundant great food and drink




For taking your judging responsibilities just seriously enough:




For allowing us to experience the scandalous fun of an empty school in summer


And of course, for chopsticks:






can someone please tell me how to rotate a stinkin video?

To Ellie and Bill:


Thanks for sharing your great toys



and your great stairs




And your great showers



And your great westy





To Mary Beth and Mark:


Thanks for a night of big laughs


and dancing






Thanks for showing me the best side of Milford




And for losing with grace and dignity



You peeps have a way of making the fun even funner.
So much more to come....
But first, so much sleep
And detox.