Wednesday, October 5, 2011

...doff thy name

I was working away today, trying to locate a subscriber in our subscriber database, when, not for the first time, I was struck by how unfortunate some people’s names are. These people in particular are physicians, so they are typically addressed as Dr So-and-so. I’m sorry, but I just have to laugh when I think of patients saying these names (and yes, all of these are actually in this database, which is limited to those interested in neuroscience, so we’re talking a pretty limited list):

Dr. Gross
Dr. Hummer
Dr. Krass
Dr. Letcher
Dr. Smuts

As I thought about this a little more, and scanned through more of the names in our database, I really started to giggle when I thought about how perfectly inappropriate some of these names would be if these docs had not opted to go into neurology, but into various other specialties:

Dr. Tan
Dr. Supple

Dr. Sharp
Dr. Staab
Dr. Skinner

Plastic surgeons:
Dr. Tuck
Dr. Lipps
Dr. Butts

Dr. Papp
Dr. Cherry
Dr. Beaver

Dr. Cock
Dr. Hung
Drs. Wienier/Weaner/Weiner
Dr. Ball
Dr. Dong
Dr. Wang

Drs. Sitwell / Sit
Dr. Butts
Dr. Moon

I know, I am very, very mature. And just to prove this, I’ll have you know that I ordered Ben & Jerry’s newest ice cream flavor this weekend. Yes, I stepped up and ordered myself a scoop of Schweddy Balls. (ew!). (Really, if you’ve not ever seen this classic SNL skit, you should.)  What can I say? It’s "Fair Trade vanilla ice cream with a hint of rum and is loaded with fudge covered rum and milk chocolate malt balls." It was yummy; I did blush a bit though. But, probably not as much as I would have if Dr. Letcher was performing my a breast exam ;-)


Pickles and Dimes said...

These are all real?!? Oh my. :) Dr. Butts. Heh.

My husband's uncle's last name is Teacher. And he IS a teacher.

Me, You, or Ellie said...

When we were growing up Dad had a couple of colleagues, married to eachother, with the last name Doctor. Dr and Dr Doctor. That just thrilled me as a kid.

Oh! And you do know Dr. Weiner has two daughters, right? Anita and Ophelia.


(And that Scweddy Balls skit? Perfection. But did B&J really name an ice cream flavor that? Ew is right.)

Mom C said...

The Dr. Doctors have a daughter, who is also Dr. post Beth. Mom C.

lots to share in PA said...

There is actually a Ob/Gyn in our group named Dr. Cherry. She is the OB, while her husband, the other Dr. Cherry is a orthopedist....probably better that is wasn't reversed.

My kids can't believe that we grewup with a Mr Weiner and and Mr Slaughter as school principals :)

I'll have to send you the news clipping of the murder trial where a Mr. Boob was killed by his wife, who ordered the hitman thru a 3rd party named Butts (can't make this stuff up) It was tragic and funny and I'm glad I wasn't the editor!

Rod's Pap is in a retirement home called Nipples Convalescent Home (really?! even if it is your family name, you don't have to put it on your business!)

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Oh, it was always such a thrill to answer the phone when Dr. Weiner called!

And I concur on the ick factor of schweaty balls, but mostly because I don't care for balls of the malted milk variety.

Funny post, Beth!


Noelle said...

I once saw a GYN when a student at Uconn named Ilsik Oh. Say it altogether...Dr. Ilsikoh....made me nervous but all went well!

Very funny and I too remember Dr. and Dr. Doctor from my Norwalk days!