Wednesday, February 1, 2012

still more conversations with crazy

Do you have a band aid?

No, didn’t you hear dad yelling about the  40 empty band aid boxes in the cabinet last night?

I cut my hand shaving a kapla block


I’m making it really pointy

You’re making a shank out of a smooth-sanded pine building plank?

What’s a shank?

Or is it a shiv? What’s the difference between a shank and a shiv? 

What are you talking about?

You know, the knives that prisoners make out of soap or a toothbrush in their cell. Is that a shiv or a shank?


Maybe shank is a verb

You can’t make a knife out of soap! (mock battle with soap shiv – don’t mess with me or I’ll stab you with my soap!”)

People didn’t always have easy access to convenient weapons, the cavemen made weapons out of wood right from the trees

They didn’t have kapla blocks

How did they make them sharp without a pocket knife?

They used rocks and stuff, or the brick walls or the leg of their bed

They had beds?!

They have beds in their cells

Cavemen didn’t have beds

What did they sleep on?

Well, they probably made beds out of fur and leaves and stuff, but they didn’t have bed legs to use for sharpening their shanks.

I bet jail beds are really uncomfortable.


Me, You, or Ellie said...

Wow! I, um, don't know what to say! So let me say this:

A shiv is "a knife, esp. a switchblade."

A shank has so many many exciting definitions! Including, but not limited to:

1. Anat. the part of the lower limb in man between the knee and the ankle; leg.
5. a narrow, shaftlike part that connects two objects or two separated parts of the same object, as the shaft connecting the bit to the handle on a drill.
6. a knob, small projection, or the end of a device for attaching to another object, as a small knob on the back of a solid button.
7. the long, straight part of an anchor connection the crown and the ring.
9. the early or important part of a period of time.
10. the narrow part of the sole of a shoe, lying beneath the instep.*
11. in printing, the body of a type, between the shoulder and the foot.

*Yesss! You could *totally* make a shiv out of this kind of shank -- a shiv *is* a shank!

Tell *that* to your little friend Mr. Crazy.

Love you.

Me, You, or Ellie said...

It might be more entertaining to tell him definition #9:

9. the early or important part of a period of time.

That might really throw this converstaion into total chaos!

Love you and your boy, and your kapla blocks.


Me, You, or Ellie said...

yawn. Check the urban dictionary, honkies:

shank, shanked

orgin: prison slang

A homemade knife.

made out of scrap of metal found anywhere and sharpened like a knife, and bottom tightly wrapped with a cloth as a handle.


to be stabbed by a homemade knife.
"CrookedEye John" got shanked up..

I heard he got hit with a rusty shank.

Me, You, or Ellie said...

ps: there were two crazies.

well, three.

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Shank is my new favorite word. Not only is it:

4. a cut of meat from the top of the front or back leg of an animal

but it is a homemade knife *and* to be stabbed with said homemade knife.

Does it get any better than that? No, it does not. Honkies.


(and I realized on my walk to work that there was *much* too much craziness in that conversation for it to be just *one* of your crazy offspring.)