Thursday, February 5, 2015


My boy got a Christmas gift that I thought I would hate.

And I do, I hate it. It's gross.

It makes things like this

I kid, I kid. I actually suggested this gift idea to my friend Tanja when one of her kids drew my boy's name in the gift swap. I knew he'd love it, and envisioned testosterone fueled evenings when  he and his dad would fry up the contents of the freezer for dinner. The photo above is that vision come to fruition. 

It's fun to cook in the fry daddy, but does anyone really want to eat that shit? 

Turns out, people do. 

I decided to employ the fry daddy for my contribution to the superbowl spread.

I started with these:

Fresh corn tortillas cut into whichever triangular fractions are your liking
Which I then submerged in batches into the cesspool of molten fat juice:

snap, crackle, pop
It doesn't take long for those soft tortilla triangles to be transformed thusly:

You've got to let them drain and dry and rest. Use a brown paper bag

give them some love in the form of a salty blend of snap

shake it up, baby!

repeat, repeat, repeat ad nauseum until your house smells like the stuff that teenage zits are made of
In the meantime, for the love of all that is holy, if you want to have and keep friends, assemble your goop!

don't forget the dental floss
It's good, people. Very good. Oh, don't forget to not photograph the finished goop next to a colorful bowl of festive chips. That would just be bragging.

Fry, daddy. Fry.


Me, You, or Ellie said...

LOL Jacquie. What's a good goop without dental floss? Cut into neat units with a garden hand cutter . . .

You are so crafty and intrepid! I can smell it from here. The good, not the teenage zits.



jacquie said...

I had to look for the garden cutter, but no! Those are my kitchen shears from pampered chef, they rule all the world!

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Well, they may rule all the world, but can they cut dental floss into uniformly-sized pieces???


MB said...

I'm SO impressed with your homemade chips! xo

Me, You, or Ellie said...

You never fail to impress me, J!! Now I REALLY wish I would have made it to the super fun, too fun Super Bowl party!

You da fry mama!!