I sometimes get caught up in the small stuff.
Case in point, last week I looked forward to the opportunity
to spend half a day marching around downtown with about 40,000 likeminded
people. There was big stuff to sweat, and somehow this felt like something I
should do, although arguably an arbitrary acknowledgement* of issues that reach
far beyond the understanding that my demographic makeup allows, it was something
I could do, and I wanted to do it. So I did.
In the days leading up to the march, our fair city
experienced some miserable weather. Rain and then rain and then rain and then
rain. Then it rained. The forecast for march day was bleak. Therefore, I
commenced to spend my wakeful nights perusing the internet for perfect ponchos.
We could adorn them, I thought, with clever commentary and female symbols. I
will need rainy day gear for Scotland, I thought, I should invest in practical,
portable outerwear. We’ll be wearing merch**, though, I thought, which needs to
be seen! Thus, I narrowed my search to transparent items. But my work was not
yet done… there’s a thing called a cheerleading jacket that is both practical
and transparent! There are reusable clear trench coats and ponchos and even
shoe covers out there in this magnificent world!
Eventually, I regained my senses and purchased lightweight, disposable, transparent rain ponchos. By this time, I needed to ensure same day delivery, which meant spending a minimum of $35. More shopping! I ended up with an entirely awesome order containing:
Eventually, I regained my senses and purchased lightweight, disposable, transparent rain ponchos. By this time, I needed to ensure same day delivery, which meant spending a minimum of $35. More shopping! I ended up with an entirely awesome order containing:
These socks
These dog toothbrushes
These ice packs
And of course, these rain ponchos
A 20-pack! I thought I’d be so helpful to so many wet women.
The merch*** arrived early Saturday, and we were all set!
A few of my sistahs came over for brekkie before the big
event, our plan was to uber to the trolley station and meet up with a few more
peeps to head downtown. I made eggie
sandwiches for everyone with our favorite Christmas present and cut up fruit,
Mary brought hash browns and mimosas, and Autumn brought nothing but asked to
borrow shoes. It was fun! We heard from
the trenches that trolley ticket lines were long and trains were already full,
and realized that it wouldn’t cost much more to have the uber haul us straight
downtown, so we gathered up our signs and our snacks and our merch and our
ponchos…. but it was truly beautiful out. I asked Olivia to check the forecast
and she has no choice but to admit that she said the fateful words: No rain til tomorrow!
So I took the ponchos out of my bag, and carried around a
mostly empty bag all morning.
You know where this is going, right? You’ve seen the photos?
It poured.
Sigh.
Sigh.
*case in point: distracted after writing that to look for a
gif of Albert Brooks saying “a lot of
alliteration from anxious anchors placed in powerful posts” but couldn’t
find it, although I did find a clip to remind me that “I can read, while I sing, I’m singing and reading BOTH!”
**I thought about also
sharing the Story of the Merch in this post but decided to withhold the last
shred of evidence of my certifiable insanity
***all you need to know
is that it was not on my doorstep at 245am but was there at 6am. Leave me alone.
2 comments:
It is actually, literally, totally impossible that I could love you more than I do. Literally. Actually. Totally.
I was talking to somebody about how, in *all* those photos, from *all* those states (even Utah, Central PA), I never saw a photo of a rainy march. OH WAIT! Yes I did! In San Diego! I mean, I can't even. Great post, sistah.
Next time maybe go with the cheerleading jacket?
The socks? THOSE SOCKS? I love the Klimt. Wait, and the Leonardo. Oh, and the Munch. And the Van GOGGGHHHHH? (Pronounce it correctly, please). *Sigh*. Fabulous.
Furthermore:
Eggie sandwich paninis?
Sorry you have to be friends with Autumn. Good thing you've got Mary.
Can't wait for the Story of Merch.
And finally?
Thank you. Thank you to you Ms. Boogsie and Mary and Autumn and Olivia and Janet and Kendal and Desiree and Tonya and their girls and all your girls and all you fabulous San Diego Women. Thank you.
Thank you.
xoxoxo
Ellie
Autumn is my favorite part of the story, she and her lying daughter.
Wish I could have joined you lovelies. You definitely had enough invisible ponchos....
And to echo Ellie - thank you for singing in the rain, sistah!
xoxo,
b
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