Thursday, August 20, 2009

A tale of two titties

They hurt. This is to be expected. I know the drill, have done it before.

But just when I'm getting used to it, when the pain is bearable again, the baby doctors decide that the baby is just not putting on enough weight, so I'm to up her feeding schedule from every three hours to every two hours. If you do the math, that's now 12 feedings instead of 8. Ouch.

Here is the best part..... in addition, they'd like me to pump, to supplement her every-two-hour feeding schedule. Wtf? How much milk can one person possibly produce? And how much can two breasts take? Anyone who's ever pumped using a double electric breast pump knows how viciously evil they are. They make the baby's nipple torture look like child's play.

This proposed supplementation involves a little syringe and tiny tubing, which goes into baby's mouth alongside the nipple. Once in, you gently push down on the syringe so that she gets the extra nutrition -- all the while you're still holding her and breast feeding and making sure the tubing isn't slipping out.. As far as I can tell it's a two person job.

It's a good thing my husband likes breasts.

3 comments:

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Aw, Beth. I'm sorry, I know it must be terrible, but I can't help but laugh. It just all seems so absurd.

And your title? I love it.

xxxEllie

Me, You, or Ellie said...

They gave me one of those syringe doohickeys with my boy, but it was more about getting him to keep sucking until my milk let down. We didn't need it much, I seem to remember it always being either dirty or on the other side of the room. (Those syringes also come in handy when you need to get sand out of someone's eye). I'll bet that upping the feeding schedule will do the trick in and of itself. I'm impressed that she'd even let you go three hours, mine were always squawking after two. Little pigs.

Keep up the good work! And stay hydrated ;)

J

Lola said...

Yikes! You're a trooper. I'd have turned to the dreaded bottle by now ;)