Thursday, March 10, 2011

toofus doofus

Stupid fairies. 

Last night the tooth fairy came to my house, and she totally screwed up. How does that stupid fairy expect pre-adolescent kids to believe in her when she pulls a move as boneheaded as leaving a rusty, lame, arcade token instead of a shiny, golden, dollar coin? 

We’ve had a long, complicated relationship with the toofus fairy in our family. It is a magical tradition that has been overwhelmingly positive and rewarding. Sure, the kids now claim to have this crazy notion that some human person is responsible for gingerly replacing toofus with coin beneath their sleeping heads, but I’m sure they’re just playing it cool. As I tell them every time the conversation is approached: “Your father and I have no use for your bloody teeth and would certainly not pay you for them.” In fact, just this morning my husband woke me with the panicked question: “did the tooth fairy come?!” For every parent’s worst fear is that the tooth fairy will forget their poor toothless child one night. As I assured him though, there's no need to worry, the tooth fairy’s got it under control. Little did I know that she had punked my girl with a Boomer’s token. 

I saw some major eye rolling glances being passed between my boy and girl after I expressed confusion about the tooth fairy’s curious offering this morning. They think they’re sooo smart. But I remember a day not so long ago when the emergence of a frontal gap was immediately followed by a mad dash to secure safe placement under one’s pillow

And I remember another day not quite so long before that when a certain skeptic put forth quite a bit of effort to communicate with the deity whose very existence is now in doubtful peril

He is a wee man with a plan.
What happened to that studious nature?

You know, just in case she wanted to give him a call.

any questions?

ps: Ciao!


Me, You, or Ellie said...

Aw, look at your tiny, tiny boy.

But I can't help but ask: a rusty, lame, arcade token? From Boomer's? No *wonder* your boy wants his collective toofus back!

This, Jacquie, "a certain skeptic put forth quite a bit of effort to communicate with the deity whose very existence is now in doubtful peril" is pure brill.

Good one. Love you. Bon Voyage!

Me, You, or Ellie said...

Oh my, your boy was so serious about that letter!

And so tiny, and blond, and adorable.

I can only imagine the look on your girl's face this morning..."Are you serious?!" (the serious in "hand quotes" ha ha).

I know the fairy has failed to come to my kids other home, but I think she's arrived each and every time at my home. She' not very generous though, although she did leave money AND let my oldest keep her tooth just a few weeks ago. She desperately wanted to keep the tooth for some reason that I don't understand, but your boy surely does.

Hopefully the fairy is not needed in the next week and a half....


Me, You, or Ellie said...

at your house....


Mom C said...

You've got to love Jimmy - I know I do... mom

Janet Johnson said...

stupid tooth fairy. dying-!