Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Rejected ideas for today’s blog post

I haven’t been sleeping well lately. I wake very early, and wallow in the deliciousness of my bed and the fact that I can stay there for a long time with nothing expected of me. This morning I watched a spider lower itself down from the ceiling into my clean laundry basket (what? you use drawers? boring). I had every intention of getting up to deal with that disturbing reality, but I forgot until just now. I wonder if there’s an egg sac in my jeans pocket.   

I am in a lotto quagmire. Seven of us from work throw in $4 per week for our shot at the millions, but we never win shit. The lowly groups always win the big prize though, right? If I bow out, they will surely hit it big. On a related note, when we win, can we really all quit work on the same day?

If that country dork goes to the final Idol, I shall puke.

I’m strangely addicted to Words. I’m not good at it! Yet I am transfixed. When it’s not my turn, I stew. When it is my turn, I invent genius letter combinations for the elusive 68 point turn. These should be words! Who wrote the dictionary, anyway?! Vuadmig should totally be a word. A triple word at that.

I can’t stand that we’re talking about the next presidential election already. Talk to me about something else, okay? Jesus.

My idea of a perfect hangover is to be horizontal watching lifetime dramas all the day.

Is there anything more depressing than blogging about the status of your knees?

I can’t believe they have not voted Boston Rob out. They are handing him one million dollars.

I don’t care what you say, this is fucking genius.  I only rejected it because everyone who reads my posts is already my facebook fan and has thus seen it 50 times already. This is the new language that my family speaks. yeah?:


Me, You, or Ellie said...

I can *not* get enough of that poor beast. Yeah? Brill.

I'm proud to report I understand *everything* you're talking about, except blogging about knees. Who would blog about knees? What which part of knees, anyway? The ACL / patella / inside bits? Or the weird-looking skin / outside bits? Because that *would* be boring.

Get some sleep, yo.

And Happy Birthday, Mistah!


Mom C said...

Ellie and Bill do a great imitation of that doggy bit - enough said about those two.... Mom

Beth said...

Love this post!

I hope when the egg sac busts, you've got yourself a Charlotte.

Do not stop putting in your $4. It would be mighty depressing to be the only one left working there the day after they hit it big (or maybe not?)

I'm unsure of the country fool of which you speak, but hey no country fool should win anything.

Vuadmig: a hairpiece used in Vaudeville productions.

Mit Romney, Mit Romney, Mit Romney. You know you love him. It could be fun, perhaps two first ladies in the white house nexy term?

Boston Rob? I've missed that guy.

The Ultimate Dog Tease? Um, anyone want to talk about the next presidential election?


Beth said...

"of whom you speak," so sorry, but taht country fool ain't gonna care, right?

oh, and "next term"



Me, You, or Ellie said...

First of all, Elizabeth, there is no way you watched that video if you'd rather talk about Mit. Even Ellie is mimicking that dog! Please at least show it to T, he will appreciate.

And are you kidding me with that word? I just made it up, lol. Half the time I just plug letters in and hit "submit", hoping for the best. I usually get a very polite: "sorry, that's not an acceptable word" message, lol.

Knee *pain*, Ellie. Pain is boring. And you understand the country boy reference? Awesome. (beth, it's american idol, he's a dolt but it was almost worth enduring his face to see him being mentored by a pantless lady gaga last night)

Love you people.