Drive

I realize that this confession is not entirely PC, but I love to drive my car. Alone. With the music -- my music -- playing loudly. For some reason it is so liberating to be driving, tunes blaring, with the windows down, alone. Especially on a beautiful day.

The two times I've been in said situation since my hospital discharge are the two times I felt the most optimistic, the most free, the most alive. It sounds bad, I realize -- my baby, my husband, my girls are absent in this scenario, but I can't deny the feeling. I feel younger, and lighter, and the world feels full of possibility.

Don't get me wrong, it's not as though these two drives have been joy rides (though they have); I've had meaningful (as long as you consider Target meaningful) destinations both times, but I do think that the southern California highway culture has had an impact. I enjoy my closed-in auto world.

I once heard some Brit on PBS comment that Americans should really get out of their cars. He made the point that are cars are isolating and keep us from actually meeting other human beings; that they breed mistrust and aggression, instead of openess and cooperation. Less car time, he went on, would provide us with more sidewalk time, which could even lead to love and friendship. And I agree with him. I do. And I love to walk. Additionally, I think public transportation is great. But I still love to drive my car. Alone. (Except in the case of road rage, THEN I'd like a passenger, preferably a big scary male passenger.)

It's terrible for the environment. I know. But this knowledge alone does not diminish my love of the freedom of the freeway.

I realize it's 2009, not 1969, and that I'm no Dennis Hopper, but this same Easy Rider desire to achieve freedom via the open road (okay, clogged so cal freeway system) remains.

At least for me.

Does it for you?